Bud Abbott and Lou Costello, a popular American comedy duo during the 1940s and 50s, performed a number crowd pleasing skits. Even today, their “Who’s On First” skit is still well known.
Another of their famous skits, “Union Loafers”, would probably be considered “politically incorrect” by today’s far-left activists. Nonetheless, the humor of this comedic routine seems to be an appropriate reminder since looming on the horizon is the “card check” scheme to end private unionization ballots.
In this one, Abbott gets a loafing job at a bakery and Costello can’t understand that he gets paid for it.
Here’s the skit’s dialog:
ABBOTT, obviously tired, walks in to messy house to find COSTELLO reading a comic book on couch
ABBOTT: Just as I … CUT THAT OUT! (very angry) What is this all about?!!
COSTELLO: Wazza matter with you?ABBOTT: I’ve been out all day long looking for work! Do you ever go out to look for work?
COSTELLO: Certainly!ABBOTT: (interrupts) Am I the only one that’s gonna do all work around here?
COSTELLO: I was workin’.ABBOTT: ah (angrily)
COSTELLO: I was reading a comic book.ABBOTT: Really, a comic book. That don’t feed ya, my friend. That don’t put food in the icebox.
COSTELLO: Wait a minute…ABBOTT: Don’t gimme that wait a minute stuff.
COSTELLO: Wait a minute, I think I heard something I didn’t know.ABBOTT: What?
COSTELLO: You said you were out all day workin’?ABBOTT: I was out there looking for a job.
COSTELLO: Did you get?ABBOTT: Yes, I got a job.
COSTELLO: Oh?ABBOTT: I hadda get a job, you don’t want to work.
COSTELLO: What are you doing?ABBOTT: I got a job in a bakery.
COSTELLO: GOOD! What are you doing there?ABBOTT: Loafin’.
COSTELLO: WHOA!ABBOTT: Oh boy.
COSTELLO: What are you doing?ABBOTT: Loafin’.
COSTELLO: Where?ABBOTT: In a bakery.
COSTELLO: You workin’?ABBOTT: Certainly.
COSTELLO: Doing what?ABBOTT: Loafing.
COSTELLO: Well that’s what I was doing here, I was taking it easy.ABBOTT: AHH! NO NO NO! Not that kind of loafing! You’re just a lazy no good idiot.
COSTELLO: I … (gets interrupted)ABBOTT: Not this kind here.
COSTELLO (still talking) I, I, I was taking it easy, just like you.ABBOTT: I work when I loaf.
COSTELLO: (after short pause) How could you work and loaf at the same time?ABBOTT: Why not?
COSTELLO: Can I do that?ABBOTT: That’s what they pay me for!
COSTELLO: They pay you for what?ABBOTT: To loaf!
COSTELLO: (after short pause) HOW DO THEY PAY YOU FOR LOAFING??? AT A BAKERS STORE YOU GOTTA DO SOMETHING?ABBOTT: I’m a baker, so I’m loafing there.
COSTELLO: You just go to work at a bakers store you don’t do nuthing.ABBOTT: Oh yes; oh yes!
COSTELLO: HOW MUCH THEY PAY YOU IN A BAKERS STORE TO LOAF?ABBOTT: Dollar and a half an hour.
COSTELLO: FOR LOAFING?ABBOTT: I’m a Union man, I belong to the Union.
COSTELLO: I’m loafing here and not getting a nickel for it.ABBOTT: You’re not supposed to get money for that kind of loafing.
COSTELLO: Well can I loaf there with ya?ABBOTT: I should say not! You gotta join the Union!
COSTELLO: I have to join the Union of Loafers?ABBOTT: You can’t loaf without belonging to the Union.
COSTELLO: Well, waddaya think o’ that? You mean I hafta join the Union in order to loaf?ABBOTT: Well certainly!
COSTELLO: Don’t say anything, but I’ve been loafing here without the Union knowing.ABBOTT: No, you don’t know how to loaf here! You can’t loaf here, you’ve got no dough!
COSTELLO: I’ve got no dough, that’s cause I’m loafing, I’ve got no dough.ABBOTT: Oh, Well, you need dough in order to loaf.Then you need a card to join the Union!
COSTELLO: You mean you need dough to loaf?ABBOTT: Well sure, how could you loaf without dough?
COSTELLO: That’s what I’ve been trying, you can’t do it.ABBOTT: Whoa; well you can’t do it. You can’t do anything.
COSTELLO: Well I can’t retire right now; I have to get a job first.
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This entry was posted by LukeAmerica2020 on Sunday; August 30th, 2009 at 8:00 pm and is filed under Humor, Unions, Videos.
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Word count: 731.
Tags: Abbott and Costello, Bud Abbott, card check, joke, Lou Costello, parody, Union Loafers.
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